You Go First . . . and other Pleasantries
The world is getting rude.
Sometimes my ears yearn for those soft and fluid words that show our humanity: our belief in Christ and the worth of a soul. The virtues of unselfishness and patience. Ah, words of kindness . . .
Print them out and post them on your bathroom mirror. Practice saying them while you are in the shower, until they sound convincingly polite and loving. Use them all day long, as much as you can. Embrace them and make them part of your vocabulary. Expect your children to do the same. Teach your littlest toddler to say, "You go first" instead of "me first".
You go first.
How can I help?
What would make you most comfortable?
It's my fault.
It's okay—I have time.
Let me help you.
Thank you.
No worries!
I'm so sorry.
Don't stress, it's fine.
Excuse me.
It's okay.
You go first.
These tender words will reap you a harvest of gentle feelings, appreciation, and love towards each other.
Ah, sweet civility!
Labels: civility, rudeness, you go first
7 Comments:
At February 23, 2009 at 9:06 AM , Andrea said...
I love that you posted this! I agree whole heatedly and wish the world could be somewhat kind again (I'm assuming there was a time). A few weeks back my daughter said "please" after telling the waitress what she wanted to order. It took her by surprise and she said, "that's something I don't hear anymore, especially from children". I thought that was very sad and telling. So in that light, thank you for your posts about quick and smart ways to bake and practical living ideas. They're helpful!
At February 25, 2009 at 9:09 PM , Dana said...
I tried the 1/3 plan. It's been about a month and I think it's working. I have a happier and more willing learner. Do you still do this with your kids? How do you find the service ideas?
thanks
At February 25, 2009 at 11:54 PM , Diane Hopkins said...
Yes, I do try to keep the "1/3 Plan" in mind. It's a good one!
Service ideas: I have realized that I could just stick with the street I live on and have plenty enough service opportunities. There are sick who could be taken some soup or a casserole, gifts to be given to new babies recently born, lonely older people who need a chance to talk, young mothers that are overwhelmed and could use a helping hand, sidewalks that need to be cleared of snow . . . and so much more than we could ever possibly keep up with! The big key is talking with and getting to know people so you can see their needs and jump in when an opportunity presents itself.
I started my own little "birthday club" as a way of showing love and doing service. A by-product is the joy of service that the kids learn through helping me with this self-appointed duty. I try to keep track of everyone's birthday: neighbors, friends, church members, relatives (even very distant) so I can remember their birthday with a card, balloon, flower or treat. Kids can hand make cards, or bake cookies or pick flowers. The delivery is very fun, as everyone is wishing for a surprise on their birthday, but to have someone who is just an acquaintance show up with birthday delights is totally unexpected and great fun!
The community has need of volunteers to do so many things too. How about just taking a walk down a local street and gathering trash to make the town a cleaner place?
Service teaches kids that wonderful feeling that comes with working to please and delight someone else besides yourself. Best success!
At February 26, 2009 at 6:55 PM , Andie~ said...
Aaah, why are some days so much harder than others? Ours has been a household of stress the last couple of weeks and boy has it taken a toll on attitudes. We have been "reviewing" the 21 Rules of the house again.
At February 28, 2009 at 9:52 AM , Toni said...
love this list it is what we try to teach everyday to our four kids. Though it is often me that needs the reminder. I willpost this on my mirror to see first thing each day and last each night.
At February 28, 2009 at 1:27 PM , Anonymous said...
Thank you Diane :)
At March 10, 2009 at 2:20 AM , L2L said...
I have been prayerfully considering this and ways to use this with our family. Thanks for being such an amazing titus 2 momma!!!!! I was also wondering do you have a button that I could use on my blog @ lovetolearn-learntolove.blogspot.com.
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