Heart-to-Heart with Diane

Hello and Welcome! Isn't raising a family the greatest!? I know I've got the best job in the world, just being Mom! I love sharing things I've discovered that make being "Mom" better, easier or more fulfilling, and that is what this blog is all about. Welcome!

Friday, January 8, 2010

Your Comments

Hello!

I love hearing your responses to my blogs! Thank you so much! Some of you comment through the online blog comment form, but most of my readers email me directly. The problem is that the way the blog sends those emails to me, most of the time when I write a response back to you—it just bounces back to me.

Will you do me a favor and respond through the comment section of the blog? I hope that is not too inconvenient. Some of the emails I get are fabulous, and I want everyone to be able to read them and benefit, and I also want to be able to comment back to you! When you email directly, though, neither is possible.

If you get my blog posts right into your email inbox, which almost all my readers do, the email looks something like this:


All the headings are links and will take you right to my blog on the internet. If you click on the heart logo, it will go to my blog. If you click on the title of the blog, in this case: The Woman I Wanted to Be, it will take you to that exact post, and all you have to do is scroll down below and click on the word: "comments" to read others' comments and also to leave a comment in the comment box. It is really quick and easy. If you have a problem, email me and I'll try to walk you through through the comment section. Better yet, all those more computer literate than I am might be willing to comment and help!

Thanks for reading my blog. I am always so excited by your comments--so much collective wisdom of all you readers, moms, women. I love you!

Diane

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5 Comments:

  • At January 8, 2010 at 3:21 PM , Blogger Rachel said...

    This reader enjoys your blog very much - and reads it from Google Reader. Because of time and a slow computer, I like to be able to read my favorite blogs all in the same place with the least amount of effort, so only read the ones with a full post to the Google Reader.

    Merry Christmas and Happy New Year - God Bless!

     
  • At January 8, 2010 at 3:34 PM , Blogger Diane Hopkins said...

    So, Rachel, does my blog come over in Google Reader with a full post?

    Thanks for writing!
    Diane

     
  • At January 9, 2010 at 10:56 AM , Blogger Denise said...

    Diane, I LOVE your blog. I get it via email so I can skim it or read it fully. I had NO idea (never thought) that clicking the title would lead me here with the ability to comment. I have thought MANY times that I'd love to comment. Now I can. Thanks!
    Hope all is well in 2010 for you!

     
  • At January 14, 2010 at 10:18 AM , Blogger Leah said...

    I have followed your blog for a long while. You are a great mom and I have some questions for you if you don't mind.
    How do you feel about lables of different kids?
    Have you ever heard of Ephraim Children?

    I have 6 children 14, 7, 5, 4, 2, almost 1. They are very strond willed, tender hearted, determind, emotional, controling and active. How do I parent them with love and understanding insted of with aggravation and frustration?

     
  • At January 15, 2010 at 10:40 AM , Blogger Diane Hopkins said...

    Hi Leah,

    Yes, I have heard of Ephriam children, and Indigo children, the strong-willed child, etc. I think every generation makes me a new term for them.

    How do I feel about labeling children? Although I do believe that unique children are born for unique times as we now live in, it seems that labels generally do them a disservice. Each child comes to earth with their own distinctive personality, spirit, needs, talents. Some come more intense, or high-spirited, than others—for sure. I think it has always been so. It takes a lot of good parenting to teach some children, whereas others are just naturally eager to please and compliant.

    I guess what I have seen that worries me is that mothers may somewhat unconsciously feel relieved to categorize their child's behavior, and once having a name for unruliness, the label perpetuates an excuse for a child's behavior, rather than stepping up and creatively finding ways to teach a child is less compliance to training.

    I've often felt that mothering requires the very most from me: it takes the very most creative thinking, the most ingenious problem-solving, the most persuasive marketing—to help a child learn to love truth, learn to discipline and control himself and learn to walk uprightly before the Lord. It is continual and takes all the love I can give. Sometimes we grow weary as mothers. The job is so enormous. And labels may come in handy to excuse ourselves at times.

    It has been proven that once a teacher reads a label on a child's school chart, such as "lowest reading group" or something like that, it affects the way the teacher interacts with the student and modifies the effort the teacher puts out. A label may discourage us mothers from having the courage to keep at our efforts to reach and teach a more lively child, I think.

    You are so blessed to have 6 children! From my viewpoint, when I had my 7 all at home, it took a level of structure and discipline to keep everyone working together as a family, rather than tugging and struggling apart. The family routines and schedule: chores, prayer, family devotional time, read-aloud, music practice, mealtimes, family night, etc. really help keep the boat sailing in the right direction, slow as it may seem at times! I used lots of charts, return & report assignments, family work projects, etc. to keep the children's energy focused on things that built the family unity. The intense and high-spirited children take more effort to raise, but they have more potential to shake the world too! So the need to train them right is even more vital.

    I found that children thrive in a situation with structure, high expectations, and strictness. There were some things I absolutely would not allow: name calling, saying "no" to parents, siblings teasing or scaring each other, irreverence of the human body, etc. I also was constantly working to make sure that chores were being done, schoolwork attended to, etc.

    Don't forget to take care of you! I think if you can get yourself in order, as a mother, your children will follow your example. They crave fairness, order, routine, predictability, because it keeps their world stable.

    I realize this is a short answer to a question that needs lots of discussion. Have you ever watched SuperNanny? You can see her for free on http://www.Hulu.com, and she also comes on TV. I like to watch her in action, because she makes it so obvious that families thrive on routine and rules.

    Best success! You are in the battle zone, so to speak, and I know it is intensive and tiring. You are battling for your children's souls, to raise them uprightly in a dark world. It takes devotion and energy, but the stakes are very high and the world depends on us mothers!

    Lots of love!
    Diane

     

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